Search Me O God

“Search (examine, investigate) me, O God, and know my heart (inner man, will, heart, soul, understanding, midst (of things), mind (seat of intelligence), knowledge, thinking, reflection, memory, inclination, resolution, determination (of will), conscience, heart (of moral character), as seat of appetites, emotions and passions; as seat of courage); try (to examine, try (of gold), prove) me, and know my anxieties (disquieting thoughts); and see if there is any wicked way (pain, sorrow; idol) in me, and lead me in the way (way, road, distance, journey, manner; of course of life; of moral character) everlasting.” Psalm 139:23-24

PONDER: Webster’s 1828 Dictionary defines pain as physical in nature and as emotional in nature: uneasiness of mind; disquietude; anxiety; solicitude for the future; grief, sorrow for the past. We suffer pain when we fear or expect evil; we feel pain at the loss of friends or property.

Sorrow is defined as: the uneasiness or pain of mind which is produced by the loss of any good, or of frustrated hopes of good, or expected loss of happiness; to grieve; to be sad.

Idol is defined as: any thing on which we set our affections; that to which we indulge an excessive and sinful attachment. An idol is any thing which usurps the place of God in the hearts of his rational creatures.

As human beings, we experience loss, pain, disappointment (unmet expectations), traumas, and trials throughout our lives, some quite trivial (lost my favorite pen) to some that are quite incredibly painful and monumental (death of a loved one). The trivial losses are rather simple to deal with (purchase a replacement pen) while the monumental losses are another story entirely (a loved one cannot be replaced).

Today’s culture appears to have a difficult time processing loss in a healthy, life-giving way. In this fast-paced, busy culture, we often fail to take time to grieve properly. Unresolved grief leads to unresolved pain which in turn, leads to a heavy (depressed) heart.

When the heart hurts, we as human beings employ one of two remedies, we either go to God or we rely on ourselves to relieve the pain (idolatry—see definition above). Human remedies include but are not exclusive to: alcohol, illicit drugs or sex, pornography, excessive TV, incessant desire for pleasure, self mutilation, comforting with food, and the list goes on.

As we turn to God to remedy the pain, He is faithful to reveal those areas of pain, sorrow, and/or idolatry hidden in our hearts; He is faithful to pour out His grace to heal and restore our souls.

I encourage you to take a moment to pray and ask God to reveal any unresolved pain, sorrow, or idols in your heart. Record what God has revealed. 

Surrender the pain, sorrow, and idols to God. Ask forgiveness for harboring any idols you trusted instead of His grace. Forgive those who may have caused you pain and sorrow, and receive God’s forgiveness, healing, mercy, and grace.

Note: if the Lord reveals overwhelming pain and sorrow due to abuse or great loss, I encourage you to seek counsel and comfort from your pastor, a mature Christian friend, or a counselor. God mediates His grace through His servants who are willing to minister His mercy and love to those who are hurting.